Holiday Stress

Things have been very busy around here at Pursuing Simplicity. I took a little break from posting in order to take care of all the things going on. If I let them, these activities can add to my stress over the holidays. I am a typical "Type A" personality. I long to be a sweet, mild spirit and a "Type B" but that was not how I was created or wired. So below are a few things that keep me sane this time of year:

I stay out of the mall. Yes, you heard me correct. I stay out of the mall! The last two years I have done most of my shopping online! I know it sounds geeky or crazy but I have found all the same bargains that they are offering in the stores online. My son wants something this year that he said is in the mall....well I found it online and it was a better price than the one at the mall. I received it in TWO days and it is perfect! You can also stay out of the mall at the holidays by purchasing your items ahead of the game. This is only the second time that I have not had all my shopping done by August. That in and of itself makes me very stressed but I have to say that the past two years I have found bargains online that I would not have found in late July!

I jump on the treadmill more! I have been exercising two times a day. Now I am not some goddess when it comes to physical fitness that is for sure but I have found that being on the treadmill first thing in the morning and once I get home from work has really taken a load off my stress level plus increased my energy!

I make a list and check it more than twice! I start out by making a list of what my teenagers and young adult son want for Christmas. We ask them to give us a few things they need and a want or two. We budget just 125.00 for each child. Whaaaattt? Yes siree bob, we only budget 125.00 for each child. Now I am sure you are wondering how in the heck do we buy anything of value for a 20, 17, 15, and 14 year old for Christmas? YOU ARE CREATIVE AND THRIFTY!

Now I know my children do not read this blog but I am a little hesitant to lay it all out here for you to read what I purchased for them. So I will leave a little to your imagination. There is a very popular brand of jacket out there currently and they are VERY expensive at least for this thrifty and frugal mom. I found two of the boys theirs for under 35.00!!!! 100.00 pullover, all teens love this brand, cool colors, purchased online at an outlet store! I purchased our daughter's jacket online this year as well. They are going to be SO excited and I still have money left over in the budget to get more items on their list!

Look for coupon codes when you shop online. I love to go to Kyle's blog, Rather-be-shopping when I am looking for bargains online. Check him out!

We focus more on the meaning of Christ-mas than the gifts. Our children have always gotten three gifts and then small things for the stocking. Christ was brought three gifts so we think it is more than perfect for our own to have three gifts. It really focuses more on the reason for the season than a free for all in the gift department.

Keep an accurate calendar and be prepared to use that two letter word...NO...It is hard with so many parties, activities, programs, and fun this time of year. We never leave out the children's activities at school. We have basketball games to attend, a choral concert for our daughter, a Winter Ball the teenagers are attending this weekend to get ready for, and two office parties. There are several other things the week of Christmas but we will take them under advisement as the time draws near. The main thing is not to overfill your calendar with so many activities that the holidays become a burden. It is a time to be joyful not stressed!

Remember traditions and make new memories. Christmas is particularly difficult for my family. My husband and three younger children lost their wife and mom after the holidays nearly eleven years ago. We have tried to make new memories and traditions as a family and I have kept some of their former traditions as well. We love putting the tree up together the day after Thanksgiving. We listen to Christmas music, have hot chocolate, and decorate the tree. We love to cuddle up and watch old Christmas movies together too.

It takes only a little imagination to come up with a few things to do each year that children look forward to. For instance, I made Monkey Bread our first Christmas together as a family. It is very simple and not too spectacular. It made a huge impact on the little ones at the time. I now make it every Christmas morning. It has become a tradition in our home. I only make it Christmas morning so they really look forward to it each year.

These are just a few things that I do to eliminate the stress of the holidays. What do you do that helps with your level of stress this time of year?

Dolllar Wise and the Dallas Morning News

There is a great series that started today in the Dallas Morning News.

Even though I live in Oklahoma I read the Dallas Morning News each morning online. Lots of great information and they seem to break news quicker on national things than our local newspaper the Oklahoman. Matter of fact, many times they have the national headlines before MSN or CNN even has them online.

It is no secret if you read this blog that we are followers of Christ and Dave Ramsey. As he so often says, "It is God and Grandma's way of thinking when it comes to money." Who do you look to for inspiration in these tough economic times?

Super Savings Saturday 10-25-08

This week has been a so-so week with bargains. I will be making a trek to CVS and the grocery store later on Saturday. However I am still finding great buys at the my favorite thrift store.

This past week my husband and I went to the store and found more awesome things for our sons and my husband. They had more great Ralph Lauren Polo brand shirts: a long sleeved polo, an awesome plaid long sleeved dress shirt, two more short sleeved standard polos, and two red sweaters by RL. But I think my husbands favorite buy was buy one pair of sunglasses get TWO free! They were one dollar a pair. One of those sunglass kiosks at the mall had gone out of business and the glasses were donated to the thrift store. I don't know about your kids but ours go through sunglasses like crazy. Of course they are picky but when the boys mow their customers lawns they don't have to always be stylin' and profilin'! LOL!

The shirts were anywhere from 5.00 to 7.00. We spent around 30.00. Once again one of the shirts had NEVER been worn! Still had the 65.00 tag on it.

We have not been to CVS in quite awhile. I am pretty stocked up and see no sense in getting more right now. I have a list for this next week so I am ready to hit the stores.

I am hoping to find canned beans, chicken broth, and veggies on sale this week at the grocery store. We are getting very low in our various types of beans we keep on hand. However, since we buy them by the caseloads they have lasted us for MONTHS. It should be about time for them to be on sale again. Let's hope so because it is now chili season and I use lots of beans in the winter.

For more Super Saving Saturday ideas head over to Money Saving Mom.

Five Steps to Peace in Uncertain Financial Times

You would have to be stranded on a deserted island or in a cabin with no television or radio to not have heard about the financial mess our nation is currently in. I know many are struggling but most I believe are living in fear of the unknown or what could happen. Many are just not prepared. True there are those dealing with foreclosures, layoffs, and difficult circumstances in regards to either financial decisions they made or that were made for them. In my opinion it is only going to become more of a problem if people don't take control of their own futures and live as our grandparents did many years ago. Greed has taken ahold many families lives. It comes quietly veiled in numerous vacations throughout the year, using credit to purchase everything, and not teaching their children the value of a dollar. Of course this problem is on a much larger scale but what if people would have been living within their means for quite some time I can't help but believe we would not have such a crisis on our hands.

There are five things that I think would greatly help in a financial crisis. I know because they have worked for us.

1. GET RID OF YOUR CREDIT CARDS
Nearly eight years ago when we married my husband and me decided that we would not use credit cards. The only thing we have used in that time has been cash or a debit card. It was one of the best decisions we made as a new couple. It forced us to save for things and to have an emergency fund. It has taught us and our children a valuable lesson on needs and wants. I think the number one reason many are in dire straits right now is that they rely on their credit cards heavily. CUT THEM UP! We had fears about not having a credit card at first too. My parents worry that we don't have a credit card but we can do anything with cash and a debit card. Let me tell you that when January rolls around and everyone else is getting their credit card bills we are not stressed because our Christmas has already been paid for in cash. We are getting ready to have our eighth cash only Christmas and we can't wait!

2. START AN EMERGENCY FUND
It is critical that everyone has an emergency fund. Start out with a goal in mind of putting 1000.00 in a separate fund. We are Dave Ramsey followers/fans. We saw him in person shortly after we married. I had been listening to Dave as a single parent each day as I picked my son up from middle school. I began trying to implement his plan for getting out of debt. When I married my new husband shared my passion in this area. We worked diligently to set up a fund. Sure enough the morning we were to attend Dave Ramsey a storm blew through our town and took off some shingles and blew over our fence. We had money in the bank for an emergency and what insurance did not cover we were able to handle. We had little money when we married and my husband suffered through losing a job. He never went without work. He mowed lawns of which he still has his lawn business that our boys now run. He worked two jobs and odd jobs and we socked away the money.

3. LIVE WITHIN YOUR MEANS
You have to live within your means. You cannot become successful if you continue on the same path of excess. This may look like different things to other people. For me it meant cooking more at home, OAMC or once a month cooking, using coupons, shopping at thrift stores, not paying full price for anything, and making sure I evaluated need versus want. There was a time when we both stopped at our local convenience store or Starbucks and got coffee every morning. No more! There was a time when I would have NEVER shopped at TJMaxx or Ross let alone a thrift store or consignment shop! Horrors!! Believe you me these are a penny pinchers best friend!

4. GET RID OF DEBT!
It took us several years but we finally paid off over 54000.00 of debt! We only owe on our home and that is very minimal. We live in a very affluent town that has more McMansions that anything else. We do not buy into the standard "Keeping Up with the Joneses". We bought a home that fit our needs with four children and it was built in 1970! Our children are not giving each and everything new thing that hits the market. If you want to know a way to get out of debt that is precise and has worked for many people look up Dave Ramsey's website The Total Money Makeover and read about his Debt Snowball. It can be done!!!

5. BE DILIGENT
Do not get discouraged! We know how it feels to be way over our heads in debt. We know what it feels like to be out of work. Be faithful to stick to your plan. Make a budget and stick to it. Being frugal is not a bad thing. Having no credit cards or car payments....is a REALLY GOOD THING! WOW! Such freedom!!! I never knew you could have no credit card or car payment. Remember we have three that are driving in our home besides us. Our nearly seventeen year old son was given an old 92 beat up Dodge pickup by his grandparents. We helped him save to repaint it bright red. My husband, father in law, and son's primed the pickup to save money. The pickup now looks amazing! It gets from point A to point B and when he needs to take more friends or his siblings we let him borrow our 2000 Toyota Corolla. We have a 2001 Toyota Sienna Van too. The boys pay their own car insurance. They earn it each summer with their lawn business. We have taught them to be diligent. As parents more is caught than taught. What are you teaching your children about debt, things, wants, etc.?

Before any of the above more than anything for us is to go to our Jehovah Jireh, our Provider, and Savior. For our family putting Christ number one and tithing to His kingdom comes first. We would not be where we are now without His guidance or wisdom. He alone is the total source of our peace.

We live in uncertain times but as for our house, we serve the One that knows our future and for that I am very grateful.

WFMW 7-9-08

We have four children. The oldest is in college with the three younger being 16, 15, and 14 years of age. Our sixteen year old has now become the driver of choice with his younger siblings while we are both at work. We began to notice that Seth was driving his siblings wherever and whenever they wanted without any complaint. He is that kind of kid…..thoughtful, compassionate, caring, quiet, obedient….great young man. He drives a big, old 1992 Dodge truck his grandpa gave him when he got his driver’s license. The gas tank is HUGE and well, you know how expensive gas is right now. Too expensive for all these aimless trips to 7-11 for Icees or Sonic for Route 44s!

My husband instituted a plan that has worked wonders. He has told the two non-driving teenagers if they want to continue to ask their brother to drive them to friends houses, the pool, Starbucks, etc., then they need to give their brother so much per week to help pay for gas.

This has done two things….cut down on all the silly trips across town when they could either wait for us to get off of work or wait until the weekend on errand day. Two it has taught them that while it is AWESOME their big brother can now drive there is an expense to it. Seth pays for all his gas except 40.00 per month. We provide the 40.00. He pays his own insurance and has paid six months in advance and already has the next six months saved up.

It is common for teenagers to not understand the immense outflow of cash that takes place. It seems minimal to them all the running around that goes on but when gas is nearly 4.00 a gallon lifestyles need to change.

This has worked wonders so far. For more ideas head over to Shannon’s at Rocks in My Dryer.

Frugal Friday 6-13-08

I have a a tip to share that will really help those of you that are living the frugal lifestyle before your children. Many times I wonder if my children 'get it'. We want them to understand why we are choosing to live life differently than those around us. Often I feel like our choices fall on deaf ears.

We have been huge fans and followers of Dave Ramsey. He is discussed frequently in our home. Our oldest is 20 years old. Two of our children are spendthrifts. Money just escapes through their hands. The oldest is one of those spendthrifts. Imagine my surprise when he told me he was halfway there with his emergency fund and was wondering if he could borrow my Dave Ramsey books. Uhh hello? I about fell over! He is in college and we have been trying to get him to see that he can do other things to pay for his college instead of taking out loans. We have preached and preached but then just decided to live our lives and see if they 'get it'.

My frugal tip to all you parents is to not GIVE UP! They do listen to you and more than that they watch what you do! We have been actively living this lifestyle for over seven years. More is caught than taught as my Daddy used to tell me. I would have never dreamed that our oldest would want to jump on the Dave Ramsey bandwagon. He has been the greatest naysayer about this choice of living. I am so proud of him!!

If you would like more frugal ideas check out Crystal's blog at Biblical Womanhood.

WFMW - 3-5-08

This week is a Backwards Edition of Works for Me Wednesday. Last time was such a great help for me when I posed the question about making bread.

I would love to hear from those that keep a written budget, either pen/paper or computerzied. I have always been a little leery having the information accessed on my computer. I have never been sure of the security features of software such as Quicken or Microsoft Money. We have Dave Ramsey's software and I have saved a few templates from Microsoft in Excel. So my question is for all of you that have a monthly budget, how do you do it? Paper, ledger, Excel, Binder, Software.....please fill me in. Also if you have success with the envelope system I would love to hear about this as well. Come on everyone....I know you have great ideas!