Simplifying Gift Giving

Many years ago I read an interview with Kathy Lee Gifford in a women’s magazine where she spoke of giving their small children only three gifts at Christmas since that is all the Three Wise Men brought to Christ. It really resonated with me at the time. I was a newly single mom and money went from abundant to below poverty level after my husband walked out. So, when I read the interview with Kathy Lee it really touched my heart. This interview was at the height of her ‘celebrity’ so if this icon of the talk show realm simplified her Christmas then surely I could do the same.

This gave me such freedom! I can pinpoint when my bargain shopping came into being…out of necessity…those first years as a single mom. The Lord was giving me insight and preparing me for ten years in the future when I would meet my current husband who was raising three young ones alone.

This is what we do. We ask them to tell us something they need, something they want, and something fun. Out of the three presents we try to have one that is the ‘big’ present or the most desired. I pick up items throughout the year for their stockings. I really put a lot of neat things in their stockings and some are need items. I hit CVS when I can get razors, hair care products, and makeup for free. With three young men and a young lady in the house items like these are very welcome. I also pick up CDs when stores have them on sale. I have put in Sonic gift cards, Taco Bell gift cards, and movie theatre gift cards. I think this year gas cards would be welcome too since we will have three drivers in our home!

Gift giving for their high school friends is another area that takes time, effort, and a little bargain shopping to really score some awesome deals. Our daughter is really the only one that likes to give gifts to EVERYONE. We have given mini bottles of Bath and Body Works items in cute little toiletry bags, mani/pedi sets, mini photo/scrapbook albums, journals, and picture frames. We also have given her friends bags of Christmas candy all tied up with a cute bow and ornament. This year we are making the candy instead of buying it. At the end of the Christmas season we will stock up again on bags, bows, tags, and ribbon for next year. Also there will be lots of great gift sets and the like that one can purchase for pennies and will be great gifts for next year!

Probably one of the most appreciated presents I have given my nieces were their Journal Jars five years ago. I purchased a beautiful journal and pen for each of them and made a bookmark. I then bought clear plastic jars and decorated them with scrapbook paper and paint pens. I typed out journal prompts on my computer and ran them off on brightly colored paper. I cut them out and folded them in half then dropped then in the jar. Some strips had favorite Bible verses on them and with a prompt to tell what this verse means to you, or one prompt asked them to write down what they were most thankful for in their parents. All in all I had around 100 prompts for each girl.

This year we are focusing more on giving gifts of time and things homemade for our friends and family. Our teenagers will still get something that they really want and they will have a great Christmas but our prayer is that once the day is over they will not feel let down that they did not have a gazillion presents but that they are thankful for what they were given and the memories created. For more Works for Me Wednesday ideas head on over to Rocks in My Dyer.

WFMW 10-29-08

If you have teenagers you know they love facebook and photos. I have a facebook account and have had one for nearly five years....before it was cool. I work at a university and that is what prompted me to get one since our university was 'logging' onto the new culture at the time. Now my teens have facebook and Mom has the passwords and frequently checks it out and they have strict parameters, etc. Many of their friends are now my friends too. But this is not the reason for my post.

What has become really neat for me as a parent is snagging the photos that their friends, youth workers, Sunday School leaders, pastors, etc put on facebook that 'tag' my children. Tagging is placing their name on their picture so that it shows up in their photo area of their facebook. I have been saving all these pictures to my computer in hopes of doing something for each of my children. I save them into folders by child's name, year, activity such for example: a folder titled Seth, inside that folder are the years 2007, 2008; then inside the year folders are catagories: FOOTBALL, Church, School, etc.

I have finally decided what this busy working Mom can do with the plethera of awesome pics from every event they attend, school, sports, friends, etc. I have begun to make small flip books for each of them. I have the football books by year, the summer beach camp with church, school year, etc. Most free photo storage sites have this capability like snapfish and a host of others. I personally love snapfish! Right now most of these sites are running specials. The small flip books today were priced at 4.99. That is really reasonable!



I have also saved the pictures of all their groups of friends and I am making a collage print for each of them.

I really don't have lots of time to sit and make scrapbooks and while I love them and have a few in progress I find that the costs are just too prohibitive at this time in our lives. However, the thing that they love the most is having something that showcases all their pictures. They are portable and really make a neat, thoughtful gift.

With the holidays coming up I think this would be an awesome way to make a stocking stuffer or a cute gift for friends. If you would like to see more great ideas head on over to Rocks in My Dryer for more Works for Me Wednesday ideas!

WFMW 10-22-08

I have already begun the prep for holiday gift giving for my teenager daughter to give to her friends. Actually it started last year at the end of the Christmas season. When I saw cute frames, photo albums, jewelry, and the like I snatched them up and put them in my gift closet. Last year I snagged some great little mani/pedi kids from Bath and Bodyworks that will be given to some of my daughter's sweet friends. Our son's don't really give much to their friends..only their closest buds and then they want to give iTunes cards. I think it is really more of a girly thing to give gifts. My daughter gives to around 15 friends something for Christmas. So this year we have all the little items gathered for her friends who are all 14 nearly 15 years of age.

The other thing I do is when Hobby Lobby puts their Christmas wrapping/bags/tags on sale at the end of the season I am thinking about all the gifts I will be giving the next year. Last year I bought the CUTEST bags and ribbon to use for my daughter's gifts to friends. I always look for something unique and not holiday looking. Last year we used red paper and leopard print ribbon. This year we are going for the hot pink with zebra ribbon look. We also make the cards by hand that go with each gift with items I have purchased for pennies when they have been clearanced.

It does not take a lot of dough to come up with precious, thoughtful, and cute presents for teenage girls. As much as they will love what is on the inside they are also all about how it looks on the outside.

Here are a few ideas to get you started:
Homemade Bath Salts
Small scrapbooks and stickers
Photo albums
Photo Frames
Personalized Shadow Boxes
Candles
Miniature Bath and Bodyworks Products
Manicure/Pedicure kits
JEWELRY
Personalized Journals
Devotion Books and a Journal

These are just a few ideas. For more Works for Me Wednesday head on over to Shannon's Rocks In My Dryer.

Back to School Frenzy

I have been on a break of sorts from blogging. Granted it is not a self-imposed break but one that has happened just the same. Having three teenagers in the home can take a toll on ones computer time. I have decided that I will try to hammer out a few posts until school starts on August 20th and then get back into my regular routine.

Today our fifteen and a half year old son got his permit! WOO HOO! Sitting at the DMV for two and a half hours was not so much fun in this searing heat we are having in Oklahoma. Seeing his smiling face after he passed with flying colors....PRICELESS! He drove me home and I must say that once you are on that third driver...it does get a little easier....I mean relaxing somewhat in the passengers seat. He is a good driver and now I need stronger knee pads....boy the praying is going to be stepped up a notch!

I wrote at the top "Back to School Frenzy" and that is what I mean. It is crazy that I have not bought my school supplies yet! However, I have a hefty supply closet that is filled from the last few years of bounty. I mean there are only so many index cards and reams of paper one can store! We are having a tax free weekend here in Oklahoma this weekend. I am headed out tomorrow along with everyone else to see what I can find.

I am sure that I will be back with a Super Savings Saturday post tomorrow. Until then, have a blessed and simple weekend!

WFMW 7-9-08

We have four children. The oldest is in college with the three younger being 16, 15, and 14 years of age. Our sixteen year old has now become the driver of choice with his younger siblings while we are both at work. We began to notice that Seth was driving his siblings wherever and whenever they wanted without any complaint. He is that kind of kid…..thoughtful, compassionate, caring, quiet, obedient….great young man. He drives a big, old 1992 Dodge truck his grandpa gave him when he got his driver’s license. The gas tank is HUGE and well, you know how expensive gas is right now. Too expensive for all these aimless trips to 7-11 for Icees or Sonic for Route 44s!

My husband instituted a plan that has worked wonders. He has told the two non-driving teenagers if they want to continue to ask their brother to drive them to friends houses, the pool, Starbucks, etc., then they need to give their brother so much per week to help pay for gas.

This has done two things….cut down on all the silly trips across town when they could either wait for us to get off of work or wait until the weekend on errand day. Two it has taught them that while it is AWESOME their big brother can now drive there is an expense to it. Seth pays for all his gas except 40.00 per month. We provide the 40.00. He pays his own insurance and has paid six months in advance and already has the next six months saved up.

It is common for teenagers to not understand the immense outflow of cash that takes place. It seems minimal to them all the running around that goes on but when gas is nearly 4.00 a gallon lifestyles need to change.

This has worked wonders so far. For more ideas head over to Shannon’s at Rocks in My Dryer.

Frugal Friday 6-13-08

I have a a tip to share that will really help those of you that are living the frugal lifestyle before your children. Many times I wonder if my children 'get it'. We want them to understand why we are choosing to live life differently than those around us. Often I feel like our choices fall on deaf ears.

We have been huge fans and followers of Dave Ramsey. He is discussed frequently in our home. Our oldest is 20 years old. Two of our children are spendthrifts. Money just escapes through their hands. The oldest is one of those spendthrifts. Imagine my surprise when he told me he was halfway there with his emergency fund and was wondering if he could borrow my Dave Ramsey books. Uhh hello? I about fell over! He is in college and we have been trying to get him to see that he can do other things to pay for his college instead of taking out loans. We have preached and preached but then just decided to live our lives and see if they 'get it'.

My frugal tip to all you parents is to not GIVE UP! They do listen to you and more than that they watch what you do! We have been actively living this lifestyle for over seven years. More is caught than taught as my Daddy used to tell me. I would have never dreamed that our oldest would want to jump on the Dave Ramsey bandwagon. He has been the greatest naysayer about this choice of living. I am so proud of him!!

If you would like more frugal ideas check out Crystal's blog at Biblical Womanhood.

Works for Me Wednesday 5-28-08

For the past several summers our boys have worked for my husband in his lawn business that he has on the side. Each summer they rake in the bucks. They tithe, save, and Seth is now paying his car insurance with this money. They also use it for some spending money for going out with friends to movies or out to eat.

However, our sweet baby girl is 14. She loves children and is very good with them. She has had a sweet gig for a family in our neighborhood this semester babysitting but we are not certain if it will continue through the summer months. She loves to shop and is hoping to make some extra cash this summer. This summer I am going to try something new with my daughter. She has asked if she can work for me around the house this summer. Now I could demand that she do certain things but I want her to have a great work ethic as the boys have and the only way to do so in my opinion is for the child to have something to work for...a goal.

Our girl is a great helper. She will make such a wonderful wife and mom one day. She has asked if she could do housework for me. We are coming up with a list for her to do each week and a wage that we will pay her. She is very excited. The only stipulation that we require is that she tithe 10% and save at least 20%. The rest is hers to use as she sees fit...within our family rules/guidelines.

She is so excited. Now I will be thrilled if she sticks it out. It can be very helpful but I also want her to have an awesome summer. Currently I am praying for wisdom in how to handle this with her and what tasks would be the best for her to take on. We are having an employee meeting on Friday night to discuss this 'job'. :)

I love it that our children are more independent when it comes to money and the things they want. They all certainly know that there is much more satisfaction in working for something than always having things handed to them.

As parents of four children, three who are teenagers and one who is 20, the costs continue to rise. A few things we have done with our kids that have taught them the value of the dollar over the years are as follows:

We pay up to 35.00 for athletic shoes/back to school shoes. If they want the latest and greatest athletic shoe for back to school, for example 100.00 shoes, they have to come up with the difference. This has taught them various ways to look for their shoes. We discovered our favorite shoe store, DSW, by looking for great places to shop. We were thrilled when Oklahoma City finally got a DSW last year. Also Ross Dress for Less has been the greatest place for us to find the boys football cleats.....TRULY....we have purchased Addidas or Nike football cleats the past two years at Ross that were a fraction of the cost at the Athletic stores.

We have really focused on the needs/wants with our children. They don't have all the latest and greatest when they first come out. We want to teach them contentment and patience.

Our children all have cell phones. Since the boys were earning money they paid up front last summer for a year of service for their cell phones. We still pay for our daughter, however, this summer she is paying for part of that service. They each picked out their phone and as long as it was free on our plan that was fine...or if there was a charge for the phone they paid for it. Each of them chose the free phone.

Where we find the greatest lack of contentment in their peers is with cell phones. Their friends change phones the way a lot of people buy shoes! It is amazing! Our teens have become resourceful because of their friends lack of contentment. Many times our children have gotten barely used phones from their friends either for free or a small charge (ten bucks). None of our three younger children still use the phone provided for them last summer...however they all have the 'hot' phones that parents are buying for their teens....only difference is our children have found a way to have the hot phones without the high price.

Same thing has happened with the iPod. We bought them inexpensive MP3 players one year for Christmas. However, as technology changes and new devices become available many teens do not want their 'old' ones. Our sixteen year old has a great 20g iPod from a friend that asked if he wanted it because he was getting the new 400.00 iPod. Is our son any less excited because he did not get it when it first came out? Maybe if he had been younger but now they have learned that if one is patient and saves for what they want....time is on their side.....it has been a great lesson.

There is so much more on this subject but for now these are some of the things that work for us in this ever changing world. For more Works for Me ideas drop by Rocks in My Dryer.

WFMW 4-2-08 Greatest Hits Edition

Shannon is hosting over at Rocks in My Dryer a Greatest Hits edition of Works for Me Wednesday. Below is one of my most popular posts from the past four months:

When I was growing up my Mom did everything for us. I dusted on Saturdays and attempted to keep my room neat and clean, but overall the most I ever remember doing was making chocolate chip cookies a few times, folding laundry, filling the dishwasher, and cleaning my room. I never even cooked or helped cook a meal until I was engaged to be married!

I admit that I am not very proud of this fact, however, I think it was also easier for my Mom to just do it herself. I was very busy with church and school activities, babysitting, and later in high school an after school job. I still have the little note that my Mom sent to me the first week of college that explained how to use the washing machine in the basement of my dorm! I mean I did not know how to even wash a load of clothes!

This brings me to my Works for Me Wednesday post. When I married my husband seven years ago and went from a single again parent of one child to a Mom of four, I knew I would need a plan for chores, responsibilities, rules...all the things that children normally have growing up in a family. However, three of my precious ones had lost their Mom three years prior and while my husband is absolutely the best, men were not created to be mothers just as mothers were not created to be fathers. I learned all I could about their Mom and what her teaching style had been for her three sweet ones and went about trying to come up with a plan.

It was one sweet act by a seven year old brunette with brilliant blue eyes that helped me see that there could be another way. In the long run, I would be teaching my children how to take care of themselves and not feel so lost as I had felt.

I came to this decision after our youngest, Hannah, had watched me intently each time I loaded the washer and dryer. She would pull a step stool up to watch and would ask questions. She was like a little sponge...taking it all in. Her Mommy had died when she was only three and a half. After living in a household full of boys for three years she was very excited to have a Mom to follow around.

One day I came home and she very proudly showed me the freshly washed towels all folded neatly and ready to be put away. I sat down and cried. Here a sweet seven year old had learned something that I did not until I was 18! She was so excited and felt so proud. It was after this sweet display of love I decided that maybe I could start with the oldest and see if this would work. I would teach them how to sort, wash, dry, fold, and put away their laundry. My husband and I discussed this and after a little research we decided sixth grade was a great jumping off point to begin this endeavor.

So my quest began. I would like to say it has worked like a charm and that there have been no problems, but I can't....I have four teenagers...three of whom are boys....however, each child has their own wash day with the washer and dryer solely devoted to them. They mainly do their jeans, uniforms, underwear, etc. Mom still does the shirts/blouses that need special care and towels. Many times I surprise them and scoop it up and do it for them. I realize that these four young adults are much further ahead in life than I was back in 1979. They each know their way around the kitchen (that is another post), can keep a home neat, and can operate a washer and dryer.

I hesitated to even post this, but I have seen the pride they each take in this ability. It has been a rite of passage in our home when each one entered the sixth grade. The boys come in after a hard practice or game and the first thing they do is stick their dirty uniforms in the washer. It has taught them responsibility in a very tangible way. It has worked for our family and brought about many positive attributes.

For more Works for Me Wednesday post, head on over to Shannon's at Rocks in My Dryer.

WFMW 3-26-08

Life keeps coming fast and since we are now through with spring break there are only nine weeks left in the school year! Summer is upon us friends!

It has always been a challenge for me as a working mom to fill the summers with fun and excitement for my children. Now that they are teenagers that fun usually means a significant outlay in cash!

We try to encourage volunteerism in our teens. For the past four summers our boys have volunteered at the Endeavor Games at the University of Central Oklahoma. The Endeavor Games is a nationally-recognized competition that allows all athletes with physical disabilities to participate in a multi-sport event similar to the Paralympics. The Games also provides training clinics for aspiring athletes. Click here to view 2007 Endeavor Games Video. They have become great friends with a lot of the athletes that come each and every year. It kicks off their summer each and every year.

Vacation Bible School is also another great time to have your teens volunteer. They can make the difference in a young child’s life while serving a worthwhile cause. Our daughter has volunteered at VBS as soon as she was old enough to help. One of our boys always helps with the skits. Our church loves to have teens help with VBS.

Another way our teens get involved is to serve as junior sponsors at our church sponsored Kid’s Kamp. Two summers ago a terrible virus spread rapidly through the camp. Many told us how much they appreciated our sixteen year old son (who was 14 at the time) and the way he comforted the eight and nine year old boys that were very sick. Even many of the sponsors got the virus. Seth cared for these throwing up boys and gave up his sheets and sleeping bag to those that had… ahem… mishaps. The point is….he could have begged off sick and let an adult take charge of those sick little boys but he stepped up to the plate and served and cared for them.

Beginning right now many communities will be putting out their calendars for the coming summer months. If you have teenagers find ways for them to volunteer. I would much rather my children serve others than sit in front of the television/video games all day or hang out at the pool each day. Volunteering prepares them for greater things in their adulthood. It develops their character and teaches them compassion. As with anything, a parent must be wise about when and where they let their teens volunteer. Be sure and check credentials if you let them volunteer somewhere other than your own church.

One more thing before I close….many teens get into trouble in the summer months because there is a lack of structure/parental involvement. One event that took place last year among one of our sons friends is each night (at least it seemed like each night) the kids ended up at one of their friends homes. The parents hosted them for the evening with snacks and supervision. Some parents had pools, some had big screen TVs with Guitar Hero and yet others had plenty of games to keep the kids occupied. It was a great time of bonding for the youth of our church who were all going to be attending five different high schools for the first time that fall.

Many times parents may feel that once their children hit the teen years that their job is nearly done. In our experience our teenagers love knowing we are involved and in touch with what is going on today in their culture. Parents, they want you to be involved and they want BOUNDARIES. Find ways this summer to give them opportunities to shine through the gift of volunteering their time. Works for our family!

Here are few more things you can read about teens and volunteering:
Teens and Volunteering
http://www.bygpub.com/books/tg2rw/volunteer.htm
http://life.familyeducation.com/volunteer-work/teen/29594.html

For more Works for Me Wednesday visit Shannon at Rocks in My Dryer.