SMORE for Single Mothers Blog Tour

Today I am so excited to host a blog tour with Gail Showalter of SMORE Ministries. This topic is very near and dear to my heart because the ministry that Gail is involved in is for single mothers. I was a single mother for nearly ten years. It was not what I wanted for my life or my son. I did not think when I married my first husband that I would become a single mother nearly 13 years after our marriage. It was painful and the journey through my single parenthood was only victorious through my relationship with Christ. Please read this interview with Gail and leave your comments either if you have experienced single parenthood or if you have a sibling or child that is a single mother currently. I will be giving away one of her booklets.



Thank you for the opportunity to share my passion for single mothers. In the United States, alone, there are over ten million mothers raising children alone. Over one third of them live in poverty. After years of being on my own as a mother of three, I came to realize how little is done in our communities and churches for this group of children with absent fathers and women with no husbands. The vast majority does not attend church, but our neighborhoods are filled with single moms.
I’ve created and implemented, along with an eleven member board, a detailed plan for encouraging, inspiring, and blessing single mothers. If you have ever wondered what you could do to make a difference for even one of the moms, this is the answer. It is easy, inexpensive, and exceedingly worthwhile.




1. You have established a ministry plan for single mothers. What motivated you to do this?A. For sixteen years I was a divorced mother with three children. I was fortunate to have family support and yet the disappointment, emotional pain, and daily difficulties were devastating. I’m happily remarried now for twelve years and my passion for the over the ten million single mothers remain strong.

2. Why do you think a ministry plan is needed?A. Single mothers have a difficult time day-in, day-out. I think churches want to provide supportive programs for them, but –though there are some successful ministries—much still needs to be done to minister to single moms. Often what you see on the outside doesn’t reveal the heartache and fear she is experiencing on the inside. Church leader I’ve spoken with have expressed genuine interest in implementing this plan.

3. What do you call the ministry?A. SMORE for Women. SMORE is an acronym for Spiritual Ministry Offering ReTREATs and Encouragement. Our program assists churches in providing Saturday reTREATs in a home or intimate church environment.

4. What is the ultimate goal of SMORE for Women?A. Our mission is to inspire and encourage women, especially single mothers, to discover and develop their abilities and inner strengths. Ultimately I hope to see churches across the country implement these programs. And in the process develop ongoing programs and activities for single mothers in their communities.

5. How do you convey this information to church leaders who want to provide a program for single moms?A. The plan is laid out in detail in print in a guidebook titled Encouraging Single Moms to Grow Their Strengths and with forms on CD’s. I serve as a facilitator when a church implements their first reTREAT.

6. Tell us why you prefer that the reTREATs be in homes?A. Homes provide an intimate, friendly, and non-intimidating environment. Homes also have the amenities for several of the pampering areas. A reTREAT can also take place in a church or other facility.

7. What do you mean by pampering areas?
A. At each reTREAT each mom is treated in several areas. Depending on the home she may use a hot tub or swimming pool. She will receive a brief massage, and even have a quiet private prayer time.

8. Is there any charge or fee to the church for you as a facilitator?A. I am available as a facilitator via long distance conference calls. For as long as I can I only ask for a love offering which helps sustain my expenses. If I must travel a long distance I ask for travel expenses. AND if a reTREAT date is on the 2009 calendar by January I will facilitate (via long distance) free of charge. The guidebooks are $20 and each of the Seed Packet booklets for the moms is $10.

9. What are the costs of implementing a reTREAT?
A. There is a nominal budget. It is similar to hosting a dinner party. Usually the volunteer hostesses contribute food. Church members donate gifts and invitations can be printed on a home computer, ordered, or printed at church. The ministry is a collaborative endeavor. Our reTREATs are very small with only six to twelve guests.

10. Are all reTREATs the same?A. No. We have eight themes for encouraging moms to discover her inner strengths.
They are
• Personality Predicaments
• Money Matters
• Bonding and Boundaries
• Job Jump Starts
• Dating Do’s
• Nutrition and Manners Matter
• Family Fun
• Grieving a Loss.

11. Where can we go for more information about the SMORE for Women ministry? A. We have a web site which is www.smoreforwomen.org and a blog which is www.seeinguthrough.wordpress.com.


A Retreat can be hosted by a small group of compassionate women. The guidebook, Encouraging Single Mothers to Grow Their Strengths, includes step-by-step guidance for planning and hosting a reTREAT. Once you’ve experienced one Saturday reTREAT filled with joy you will want to plan another and another. In the process you will get acquainted with some remarkable women and you might inspire them as they see Christ in you. Please visit SMORE for Women at www.smoreforwomen.org.

Gift of Giving Challenge

Over on the Bargain Shopper Lady, she shares a precious story of how a stranger blessed her family over the holidays. She has encouraged us to share our stories.

Immediately upon reading her sweet story, I was reminded of a time in my life when things were very tight. I was a single mom and my sweet little boy wanted to go out to lunch after church. It is so hard when you are always denying them simple pleasures, so this particular Sunday I gave in and took him to lunch. We went to his favorite 'birthday' celebration place, Santa Fe Cattle Company, since I had coupons from our Entertainment book that I could use. I dug them out of my purse and off we went!

It was very nice to sit and listen to my then seven year old son talk about his football team and school. Our food arrived and he wanted to pray. I remember holding his hand as he prayed and being thankful for his sweet spirit. Across the room I noticed a couple from church. They were my parents age and the husband always had candy for Matthew each time he saw him at church. I waved and they waved back.

Later on we were ready to leave and I was getting a little flustered because our server had not come back with the bill. A few minutes later she came to our table all aglow and told me that I did not owe anything and that my bill had been taken care of. I was quite shocked. I burst into tears. My little boy said in a loud voice, "Jesus provided for us Momma!" I was in shock and felt so grateful. I begged her to let me know who did such a thing so I could thank them. She was told to not tell me who had blessed us so. It was on the way home that I remembered the couple from my church. I never really found out who had blessed us but I told my son that one day we were going to be able to do the same thing for someone else.

Now some thirteen years later I am married and have four children. We have since had many opportunities to bless others and in return have been blessed. I want to always be sensitive to the Spirit so that we do not miss out on little chances to be the light to someone else. May God use you this week to be a blessing to another.

Tonight my heart hurt

Tonight I had an hour to kill while waiting for my youngest to be out of FCA (Fellowship of Christian Athletes). I thought I would check out Dollar Tree for a bit. Boy did I have many memories come flooding back to me right in the aisle of this great little dollar store. I saw two different moms pushing their carts with little children inside. Each Mom had a harried, exhausted look about her that I all too well remember. It was more than the usual busy Mom look. In an instant I felt my heart quicken inside my chest because I just knew these two moms were carrying the load by themselves. Sure enough they were each single mom's. I walked that road for nearly ten years. I remember those dark, cold, lonely times when I had more month than money. I remember how my own little boy would say the same things these two little ones were saying to their own Mommy's.

I have been remarried now for nearly seven years to a most wonderful Godly man. The Lord answered the cries of my heart and He most certainly did not disappoint. He not only brought me a helpmate but He provided for me three more little hearts to love, nurture and cherish. This season is especially hard on my crew. Their wife and mom died from cancer shortly after the holidays ten years ago. It is always a little bittersweet this time of year and now that the children are teenagers they deal with their grief in different ways.

All I know is that tonight my mind went back to that place, not so long ago, when I was pained in my spirit, wondering what the next day would bring, how the Lord would refine me and when I would feel some peace.

I remember those times of fear, loneliness, and despair. I remember the shame I felt that my husband had walked out of our marriage and chose a life that was so far removed from what I had been taught. I felt let down and discouraged but never did I critize or blame the Lord. I knew He had a plan and that He would work out His will in my life even when I felt like I could not go on another day. I won't even go into the pain I felt in my heart for my little boy who was four when his dad chose to abandon his family.

The Lord was always faithful. He never left my side, but all the while I had to run after Him, surrender to Him...that is the hard part...SURRENDER. Surrendering hopes, dreams, desires, plans all to the One that is control of each of those things. I had to learn to TRUST Him to bring about His perfect plan for my life.

Tonight I wanted to wrap my arms around these sweet ones that were hurting and tell them, "Regardless of what takes place in your life....there is a way to find peace and fullfillment". Each time I tried to strike up more of a conversation we were interrupted. Lord tonight I pray for those two sweet families. You know them and their situations. Please provide for them this season. May they know You and please give me continued opportunities to share your love.
Praising Him in ALL things!